How to Occupy Yourself in Heavy Traffic

I live in Los Angeles, the hub of ridiculous, unnecessary, "what the hell is causing this" traffic!  Every day, no matter what the time, the 405 and 101 are full of pockets of traffic.  I go to the gym at 5 AM - traffic.  I drive to work at 8 AM - traffic.  I drive to a movie at 8 PM - traffic.  You get the point.  I'm constantly thinking doesn't anybody work in Los Angeles?  The answer is yes and no.  Los Angeles is a kingdom of freelance and part time work, home to actors, writers, artists, etc.  It makes sense that people are all over LA, ALL of the time.  The traffic never stops.  Instead of bitching endlessly about the traffic, which admittedly I still often do, I've come up with a few ways to entertain yourself while stuck in the smog. 

There's no way you can tell me you don't remember eye spy.  Books were invented from this fabulous game!  The rules are simple.  You say, "I spy with my little eye..." and then describe something that you see around you.  Let's see an example, shall we?  "I spy with my little eye something red."  Is it your lipstick? "No." Is it my sweater? "No." Is it that red prius up ahead? "No."  It's the breaklights of the car in front of us, isn't it?!  "You got it!" 

A word of caution: this game has to be played at complete stops.  If you spy something and then traffic picks up, you're likely to pass your item making it difficult for your partner to ever guess what it was!

I learned this game from my parents.  They're music nuts, and they kick my ass every time.  It can be played with one person, but it's more fun with two or more.  The rules are simple: name that band before anyone else can. Bonus round: name the song. This game sounds simple, but it's rather difficult when playing with music afficionados. Naming the band gets you two points. Once the band has been properly named, naming the song gets you one point. After the band and song have been properly labeled, change the radio station. The first person to 50 points wins (100 points if the traffic is really bad). Rock on!

I have a terrible habit called people watching.  People do crazy things when they think they aren't being watched.  When else would you pick your nose in public?  Never.  But somehow when people are in the confines of their vehicles they think that no one can see them digging for gold.  I play this game that my boyfriend finds hysterical: I narrate people.  I watch the way someone acts in his car and speak for him as if I were his own inner voice.  Hmmm, what should I have for dinner tonight?  When I finally get out of this traffic I'm going to stop at McDonald's.  Maybe this booger will hold me over.  Nah, I'll just smush it into my pants instead.   It sounds silly, but it's quite amusing.  I do the same thing at zoos when watching the animals.  I wonder what that says about my thoughts on the people I choose to narrate!

This is an alteration of the better known ABC game: while passing road signs, restaurants, billboards, etc. you must get from A to Z with the words you see (God bless passing a Dairy Queen when you need a Q).  But since you're stuck in traffic, you'll be looking at the same billboards for quite some time.  With this version of the ABC game, you merely need to find the letters.  With bumper to bumper traffic, you'll have plenty of license plates to look at!  If you're playing against somebody, he can't use the same "e" that you use (and so on).  The first person to get to Z wins!

This one is easy: you hum a song and your passenger guesses the band and the name of the song.  Two points for guessing the band, one point for guessing the song, FIVE bonus points if you can sing the song in full (without missing any lines)!  The five pointer is a difficult one, especially if your passenger picks a song like "It's the End of the World as We Know it (And I Feel Fine)."  As a matter of fact, give twenty points for knowing all of the words to that song; that is one difficult task!